mothering

Calm

Calm…

Calm is not one of the better words to describe me…

I am probably one of the worst at staying calm, and I’m sure my kids get the brunt of it. When other times I am quiet but it’s welling up inside me with great force. This frustration, this rage, this storm…

But last night by God’s grace when the baby was crying on and off for 3 hours for who knows what reason. I had fed him to his hearts content, let him cry a bit…very loudly IN MY EAR, and gave him teething oil. I was tempted to lose it, to let that feeling welling up inside take over but the Lord quickly reminded that it would not help me get to sleep any faster. I mean that precious sleep was my end goal right lol.

But this time…I stayed calm! I took him to the rocking chair in the corner gathering dust and the Lord filled my heart with this peace and joy as I sat their rocking my screaming almost toddler. And you know what, he started to calm down. It worked this time! He called down and within 20 minutes we were both fast asleep in our own beds.

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I cannot promise that I will be calm, peacefull, self controlled every second of today. Like when my 2 year old is playing in the bathroom sink for the millionth time today, or when the older boy complains about every single meal, or when other testing moments come but I’m gonna take it one victory at a time because….. his Grace is sufficient for me!

 

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