This week has been so hard…just plain old hard! And it’s only Wednesday! Between Thomas starting a new semester of night classes, dealing with mice, the kids going completely crazy (especially a certain 2 year old girl), and my mile long to do list, it’s just been HARD.
We had a lot of fun on our trip! I was so nice to see all our family and friends! We spend time on the farm (the kids favorite), fed rainbow trout, hiked and saw a waterfall, had a few birthday parties, and drove and drove and drove some more. They kids really did do amazing, but exhaustion set in and they’ve been difficult since. I’ve had to do some refining since we’ve been home.
I kinda feel like I’m in a soundproof glass box lately…I have a million things to do but I can’t get out, no one can hear me, especially the kids… I want too get out and get things done but it’s just overwhelming alone… I’m an all or nothing type person so it’s hard for me to celebrate small victories, like yay I got 1 basket of clothes folded, even I have a couch full to go. I pray that the Lord with help me fine joy and accomplishment in my home making and mothering again.
Thomas asked me this morning if it would help me to bring in outside hired help once our twice a month. In one hand it would be wonderful, in another hand, it would be hard to have someone I dint know come into my mess. I wouldn’t even know where to tell them to start. Maybe I’ll search for someone who isn’t afraid of 5 or 6 small rambunctious children, and a disorganized mama who isn’t feeling that great.
Ok, I admit it! I need help! I’m just a little overwhelmed over here and things are a bit crazy.
But for now, I’m drying my tears, wiping my nose, putting on my very large big girl pants, and getting out of bed because in approximately 15 minutes a certain 5 year old is going to sling his bedroom door open and in a growly voice let Me know he’s starving and wants tv. A baby and toddler will both want all of my attention at the same time, the 4 year old will begin for chocolate milk and drink it with the same look he had while breastfeeding, and eventually the nearly 7yrs old will stumble out of bed with an agenda of his own that is not even close to mine! But you know what???
Yes I’m having a rough time. I cannot get through one moment without God and his mercy and Grace (quite a bit of it lately). …
I wouldn’t have it any other way!
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9